Anders Martí - 2 Weeks Old
Anders is now 2 weeks old (and a few days). After 13 days in the NICU, Anders got to come home from the NICU on Sunday. We are so thrilled to have him home with us!
Last blog post, I wrote about Anders’ birth story, and today I’ll share a bit about his NICU stay.
When Anders was born, he was doing really well, and I was able to hold him for a few minutes before they took him to the NICU. When it was time for him to go, Ron went with him. Thankfully, Anders lungs were developed and his breathing was great. During the entire two weeks, he never needed oxygen or any help with breathing! So right off the back, he checked that box off.
The nurses spent about an hour trying to get Anders IV in. Poor little guy was poked and prodded so much before they finally got it in his foot. (I’m so glad Ron was the one with him through that and not me!). They used the IV to give him sugar water to make sure his blood sugar stayed up. It’s crazy how quickly you adjust to all the cords attached to your baby. In the beginning, I didn’t feel comfortable getting him in and out of his isolette, but by the end, I would do all of his cares myself no problem. We also quickly got used to all the beeping and monitors and new when it was a cause for alarm, or if something like burping him set one off.
From the beginning, they started with bottle feedings. During that first 24 hours, the nurses kept asking me if I was ready to start pumping, but I was so miserable on the magnesium, I kept saying no. I knew I wouldn’t have any issues producing milk (after all, even when I lost Roman, my body painfully produced so much milk even without me trying), so I knew I’d be fine to give myself a day to rest and feel better.
Once I came off the magnesium, I got the supplies from the NICU to start pumping. They gave me these tiny syringes to collect any droplets of milk I might produce. I thought to myself, I’m pretty sure I’m not going to need these, but I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to be cocky haha. But of course, I immediately started producing vials of milk as soon as I started. I’m grateful that I haven’t had to worry about my milk supply during this season of pumping!
I positively loathe pumping by the way. Like really, truly do. With Luca, I managed to never pump a single time! My little Covid baby was by my side every hour of his first year of life haha. But now with premature Anders, I am pumping around the clock. I am hopeful and optimistic that as grows and gets bigger and stronger, he will be able to successfully breastfeed, but for now, I’m continuing to pump.
While Anders was in the NICU, I was allowed to try breastfeeding him twice a day, and the rest of the time he received fortified breastmilk in a bottle. On Day 3 of the NICU, Anders got a feeding tube to supplement any feedings he didn’t take. He honestly didn’t have to use it too much, maybe one feeding a day. One day, while Anders and I were Facetiming everyone back home for Fynn’s birthday, Anders pulled his feeding tube out entirely and as I was scrambling to get a nurse, he also ripped his monitors off his chest too! Such a feisty little guy! By Day 5, he did the same thing again, and the nurses decided to just leave it out for the day to see how he did. He never needed the feeding tube again!
On Day 6, Anders got a bili-blanket to help with his mild jaundice. But after 24 hours of being a little glow worm, he was good to go!
So really, the last thing, and the reason we were in the NICU so long, was that Anders needed to be able to regulate his own body temperature. He was in his isolette with the heat cranked up, two layers of clothes, two swaddles, and a hat and still just barely holding his temperature. So that process was really slow going for him. Thankfully, he was eating so well and starting to gain weight, so that helped.
Finally, on Day 12, they decided to be a bit aggressive and try moving Anders to an open air crib and see how he’d do. They told us it would likely be a lot of back and forth for several days, as it had been such a struggle for him.
So we were positively shocked when the morning of Day 13, I got a call from the doctor saying he was ready to go home! We were so thrilled and excited to bring him home after 2 long weeks.
I’ve said it before, but I truly am grateful that our NICU stay was mild and short-lived in the grand scheme of things. We honestly were never worried about Anders and that (slightly) helped us to leave him each night. But it doesn’t mean that it was easy by any means. I opted to stay as long as I possibly could in the hospital to be near Anders, meaning that left Ron alone at home to care for 4 kids and my mom (who had broken her foot). Then once I was home, I would go see him for 2-3 hours during the morning while Ron juggled work and the two littles. In the evenings, Ron would then take his turn to visit Anders. The hospital Anders was at was about 25 miles from us, so we were driving at least 100 miles each day just to see our son for a few hours. Ron and I didn’t get to hang out with each other for 2 weeks. The kids didn’t have us both home for most of that time. Logistically, it was really tough.
It was also really tough emotionally. It is incredibly hard to leave your baby behind every day. Even though we knew he was in great hands, it was just so hard to say goodbye every day. It was also so strange to only be taking care of my newborn for a few hours of the day. Then I’d go home and return to life with the other 4 kids, just as it had been two weeks prior. It was like I was living two separate lives, constantly being torn between Anders and his siblings.
And then there was another strange layer of emotions that I didn’t expect. This was the second time we left the hospital without bringing a baby home. Only this time it was much different. While it is very difficult to leave the hospital with your baby in the NICU, it pales in comparison to bringing home a box of hair clippings, empty clothing, and funeral pamphlets. But all that being said, it stirred up a lot of PTSD for me. The ache I felt physically to be near and hold my baby, quickly transported me back 4 years ago. I didn’t go into public, because the confused comments of “you had your baby!” while searching for the baby, was just too triggering for me. All of the feelings I had four years ago came rushing back. In my head, I knew Anders was alive and we’d bring him home soon enough, but it was just so hard to shake those feelings.
I wasn’t the only one who was feeling it too. Fynn in particular had been very worried about Anders the entire pregnancy. He constantly prayed for Anders to survive and come home. Well, when he was born and didn’t come home, it was so tough on Fynn. Every time we Facetimed, he needed reassurance that Anders was alive and wanted to see him move in some way. When Anders came home, Fynn cried tears of joy for the first time in his life. He was so relieved to finally be able to hold his brother and be assured tangibly that he was okay.
Overall, we are so grateful to have Anders home now, and honestly so grateful for his time in the NICU. We met some of the kindest nurses that truly loved to care for our son. Anders’ reputation proceeded him, as each new nurse would tell us how they had heard how precious he was and how eager they were to be assigned to his room! One nurse even said she wanted to name her future child after him! So he was definitely in excellent hands. The two weeks in the NICU ensured that he got off to a great start!
